My thoughts on Modernising Medical Careers - March 2007

MMC is an ill thought-out wankfest, destined to destroy the careers of thousands of junior doctors.

This shameful cuntathon of an online exercise in humiliation will leave large numbers of doctors, some with several years experience in a speciality, fighting over the crumbs of a few jobs that will ultimately produce 'specialists' with fuck-all experience, but who are so glad to have a job that they will not question the politically driven chainsaw-job that the NHS is being mangled into.

The application process has been thrown together by a group of morons wholey out of their depth, working with insufficient resources which have been devised and allegedly planned by a bunch of driveling fuckwitts whose primary hobby in life is playing with themselves.

My future, my earnings and my ability to pay off a mortgage have suddenly been channeled into a two week wank-fest of an online application which kept crashing, kept giving me incorrect data about where the fuck I could end up living for the next four years, and now, as transpires, will be marked in a sea of chaos. My log-book (huge), my publications, my ABILITY TO DO THE FUCKING JOB have been condensed to 15% of the marks I'll get for the form, while 85% is some touchy-feelly bollocks that will make fuck-all difference to whether I can do a minitrach on an epiglottitis patient about to die, or stop a hosing nosebleed before a patient exanguinates.

To all the arse-licking dickheads who have the misguided impressing that MMC is going to be a good thing, well, are you going to enjoy coming in at 4 O'Clock in the morning because your 'registrar' can't pack a simple nosebleed? Are you going to enjoy phoning a registrar from your GP surgery for urgent advice on a condition that they have neither seen nor heard of? Well, get used to it. Its what the government want, its what the government have planned, and its what the government will get.

Fishgoth (pissed off, on nights, third night in a row I've been covered in blood head to toe at 4 am. I'd love to see an MMC generated surgical trainee deal with some of the life-threatening stuff that I've had spray my way recently)